I have done something bad..
I know Mr Zoidberg. And I do feel bad.
...
Relationship.
Kebanyakkan yang kita jumpa persamaan matematik, lebih merujuk kepada 2 pembolehubah, walaupon ianya macam \( f\left( x \right) = x\). Sebab \( f\left( x \right) \) itu sendiri merujuk kepada pembolehubah (yang merujuk kepada \( x \), atau kita panggil sebagai fungsi untuk \( x \)).
Dua pembolehubah senang kita nak gambarkan. 2D. Dua dimensi. Dan nampak menarik. Macam chart - chart kat dalam entri aku sebelum ini. Kalau satu je pembolehubah, kita nampak macam ni.
Tapi mana ada orang buat camni untuk satu data je. So the better representative is like this:
Teringat aku masa 2010 aku kat UTM. Masa tu aku kerje sebagai research officer. Aku report kepada Prof Dr T. Dia pernah buat luahan perasaan kat aku (berkaitan dia nak fail kan ke tak sorang candidate PhD Math ni).
Dr T: Fairuz, kalau I draw line dari kiri ke kanan sepanjang dunia ni, apa akan jadi?
Aku: ?? (clueless)
Dr T: Kalau orang buta tau ada satu line lurus macam tu, dia tau tak kanan tu apa dan kiri tu apa?
Aku: Errr. Kalau ke kanan, menaik. Kalau ke kiri, menurun.
Dr T: Ha itu la. Semua orang tahu. Orang buta pon tahu.
Then dia proceed dengan luahan perasaan dia. Aku dengar je sambil cedok ilmu dia sini sikit, sana sikit.
The point I'm trying to make is, for 1 dimensional, senang. Ada satu value sahaja. Orang buta pon tau which one is going to positive and which one is going to negative.
Tapi jangan lupa. Nilai "1D" ni lah yang banyak kita guna seharian.
Ok enuough buildup.
Kita akan gunakan nilai "1D" ni untuk define relationship.
Macam aku citer sebelum ni, relationship can goes both way. Bidirectional. But for this entry, I'm going to use relationship between me and other people.
Ok so untuk memudahkan kerja kita, kita define all value for relationship will fall between \( \left[ -1, 1 \right] \). There will be a finite value untuk relationship. Sebagai contoh, kalau untuk kategori suka dan tak suka, we can define "TAK SUKA" sebagai negatif dan "SUKA" sebagai positif.
Kalau aku tak suka sangat dengan orang tu sampai kalau dengar nama dia pon terus muntah darah, sampai masuk hospital, so tu maks la tu, kita define dia sebagai lowest, with the most min value is \( -1 \). Dan kalau aku terlampau - lampau suka sangat dengan orang tu, kita define positif with max value \( 1 \).
Now, relationship ada banyak jenis. Easiest way is to define it, ikut "verb" dan negate dia. These are for relationship between two people (but I don't see why we can't use it between people and things too!).
Suka = positif. Negatifnya = tak suka.
Admire = positif and loathe as negative.
Recomendation makanan betul = positif. Recomendation makanan tak betul = negatif.
Again, cara guna, kalau kalau orang tu rekomen makanan tu sedap dan aku test memang sedap, positif la dia dari mata aku. Kalau orang lain rekomen makanan tu sedap tapi aku test tak sedap, negatif la dia.
Untuk kes kali ini, kita nak tengok kalau orang minta pendapat aku.
We define it as, kalau orang tu terima pandangan aku positif. Kalau aku kasi pandangan, dia tak dengar, kita anggap dia negatif. We define it as,
\[ RelationshipPandangan_{0,a}=\sigma, \forall \sigma \in \left [ 0, 1 \right ] \]
So kalau aku kasi pandangan dan dia tak dengar, kita cakap sebagai \( - \sigma \). Kalau aku kasi pandangan dan dia dengar, kita anggap sebagai \( + \sigma \). Subset \( 0 \) tu merujuk ke aku dan \( a \) tu kepada one particular orang lain. So read \( RelationshipPandangan_{0, a} \) as relationship pandangan aku kepada orang lain. Dan kalau \( RelationshipPandangan_{a, 0} \) tu pula merujuk orang tu kasi pandangan ke aku dan aku terima ke tak. Bidirectional. Nilai dia tak semestinya sama.
Ok?
...
Ok. Aku nak citer ni. Aku somehow "macam" terlibat dengan ada satu projek yang quite haywire dalam company aku. Semua serabut. Direction pon tak tau macam mana. "Macam" tu sebab basically department aku, takde la terlibat secara direct. Kitorang lebih kepada application untuk menggunakan product dari project tu untuk specific use case dan implement kat tempat client.
But the direction from my boss is clear.
You guys jangan masuk campur pasal projek besar tu. Korang buat je kerje yang I suruh. Kalau diorang tanya, you guys cakap tak tau. I pon tak nak amik tau pasal diorang tu.
Straight and clear. And we understood our assignment.
Tapi sebenarnya dia yang banyak suruh aku deal dengan team member projek besar tu. And somewhat, aku terlibat/slash/tak terlibat dengan projek tu.
And my boss knows clearly. Aku ni selalu dicampak oleh team member projek besar tu kalau ada apa2 hal.
And whatever happens pon, our relationship between aku dengan team member projek besar tu, overall still lagi \( + \sigma \). Kecuali dengan top management diorang. I know boss aku maksudkan jangan terlibat dengan top management dari team sana. And so, I'm keep avoiding from them. Kadang - kadang tu ada berborak tu ada la. Dapat instruction direct dari top management sana, aku terus mengadu kat boss aku. Basically aku dengan top management diorang \( - \sigma \).
It doesn't seems like harmony untuk kerja dalam satu project. But again, I don't care pasal \( - \sigma \) tu. Aku kerje je ikut instruction bos aku. Bukan bos orang lain.
Right.
...
Projek besar tu sangat haywire. Korang bayangkan, sampaikan nak guna satu product ready made tu, diorang mintak source code untuk product tu. Macam korang pakai Microsoft Word lepas tu rasa nak integrate sikit, korang mintak source code Microsoft Word tu.
Now, I'm hearing from both side. Yang team yang nak kene improve the flow (the new team) and the original team (the real OG) yang buat product tu. One side kata the OG team tak kasi kerje sama. The OG team kata they already comply whatever they asked and done what was instructed.
The new team is asking for the source code of the product. And the OG team keep hesitating (boss aku cakap).
But I do understand why OG team is hesitating. Bayangkan elok - elok source code tu ada kat dalam protected repo, lepastu kasi ke team lain. Kita mana tau apa yang diorang buat kat code tu. Or kepada siapa diorang akan lepaskan source code tu (can also refer to my post yang lama pasal copy and paste ni: Sorted Stack II).
For programmers, the source code is like their life. They put all their effort onto that. Hati dan perasaan semua ada kat dalam source code tu.
But I also do understand why the new team is asking for source code. The stress is building up. They need the answer as fast as possible. Instead of waiting for explaination, why not dig down to the real content and see what is happening.
I also assume that they were just following orders (top management trying to trap the OG team sebab dia tau, mana ada programmer yang suka - suka kasi source code ke orang lain). So they use the new team as their execution.
And yea I said it. The top management trying to trap the OG team. Because they keep demanding the things that THEY KNOW the team OG don't want to do it. Kalau team OG tak tolong, diorang akan kata: team OG tak beri kerjasama.
Why I said that? For me, the top management trying to keep a bill. In case kalau project ni failed, they will said that it is because the team OG tak kasi kerjasama. The bill is the price of kambing hitam. Teruk.. kan?
It's no brainer which switch they will push when the time is come
And you wondered why I said it haywire?
...
But again, both team are my friends. Relationship for me and each of (both) team members are \( + \sigma \). And I do hope so from their side.
20 Januari, 2024
Ada la sorang team member dari new team tu minta tolong aku. Basically dia minta pendapat dari aku about the deployment and implementation of this project. Kene pulak nama aku kene petik dari old boss the OG team. "Ask Fairuz, he already done that", kata bos tu. Dah aku pulak yang kene. Memasing ni kann..
But.. Now now. Since I'm already hearing from both side, I'm thinking I might have a chance to help out a little bit.
So I am suggesting to him, that act like a SI (System Integrator). Try not to modify existing working code. Just develop an app that will utilise the existing API. Only change the code if you are really really sure.
So we ended up kat situ. Not a single code kitorang tengok. Aku rasa ok lah camtu. "Jangan kacau barang orang lain.", teringat pesanan mak aku.
Little I know, I am actually making it worst...
...
So beberapa hari lepas tu, aku berborak la dengan kawan baik aku (letak nama dia as L2, sebab lepas ni nak refer balik). So dia cerita la. The new team member tu actually minta akses masuk ke server production team OG!!
I..
Wait..
What?
That is totally not what I meant!
So appearantly, aku rasa aku seolah - olah aku yang suggest test ke production. I mean, nobody will do that except kalau nak buat maintenance! And you are not doing that. Korang nak integrate!
Sakit betul kepala aku minggu tu.
Penuh dengan remorse.
What I have done!
Tambah pulak L2 ada cakap, "Kalau benda tu I tau tapi bukan I punya domain, I terus suruh diorang refer ke yang betul - betul arif".
Terasa betul.
...
24 Januari, 2024.
Bos aku jumpa aku. Borak pasal projek. Tapi at the end of the discussion, dia cakap kat aku. Slowly. "I tau u borak dengan the new team member tu. Satu je I nak pesan kat you. Kalau orang tanya melibatkan projek besar tu, you cakap je you tak tau dan tutup talifon".
Terdiam.
Teringat. Fixing was supposed to be the my theme for last year (1444H), and it shall carry on my shoulder forever. Tapi apa yang aku buat ni, ini bukan fixing...
Ini opposite of fixing...
...
26 Januari, 2024.
Before and after solat jumaat, I have done a lots of thinking. Aku tau, kesannya tu ke the whole OG team. But there's one particluar person yang aku betul - betul kene minta maaf.
So aku beranikan diri. Aku mesej ke JR. "Can i call you whenever you are free? I need to apologise to you". And she replied "Sure thing. What's up?"
Aku call lah dia. Aku rasa lebih 20 kali aku minta maaf. Itu pon aku rasa tak cukup. Dia pon gelak - gelak je. Kata no worries. This is all miscommunication. Lagi lah aku rasa bersalah. This won't happens kalau aku tak bukak mulut. The term "tak beri kerjasama", maybe I was one of the contribution for this. Sebab aku tak tutup mulut.
Aku pon tak tau nak cakap camne lagi.
It is not easy to have \( + \sigma \). It come with a cost. I should treat it carefully just like L2 said.
But I learned my lesson.
And I shall add it to my baggange, and I'm going to carry it until the end of my life.
And no. I need not another giving hand..
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terima kaseh :)